


Stay

by stellarmeadow



Category: Captain America (Movies), Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, M/M, Marvel Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-07 17:24:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1907505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarmeadow/pseuds/stellarmeadow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As 5-0 investigates an assassination linked to an M.O. going back fifty years, they get more than they bargained for when Captain America and Sam Wilson show up to help.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story has been stuck in my head for months, but I needed for H50 to be done before I wrote it, and then it took longer than planned, and ended up about twice as long as planned. But I couldn't let go of the similarities between Steve and Steve, and I really loved exploring that, and how it affects those around them. So happy to have it finally out there now, though, and hopefully there are more than a dozen people who actually want to read a crossover between these two universes.
> 
> In case you're not familiar with one of the universes, here are quick ways to catch up so you can read:
> 
>  
> 
> [Captain America 2 Summary](http://marvel-movies.wikia.com/wiki/Captain_America:_The_Winter_Soldier)
> 
>  
> 
> [Summary of H50 Season 4](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hawaii_Five-0_\(season_4\)#Episodes)
> 
>  
> 
> Huge thanks to all the people who encouraged me when I was banging my head against the wall with this thing. Hope you enjoy it for your suffering in having to listen to my frustration! :)

The drive to U of H was a lot quieter than their usual rides, and Danny knew he was partly to blame. He was usually good at filling any silences, but lately any topic he brought up, no matter how broad, led one of three places--Catherine, Doris, or Wo Fat.

He wasn't in the mood to talk about any of them, so he kept his mouth shut. 

"I don't get it," Steve said, eyes on the road, which, while good for their continued safety, was never good for their conversation. 

"The Governor is receiving death threats, so we need to be on site for his dedication of the new research facility to make sure he lives through it," Danny said, hoping Steve would take the hint. "What's to get?"

Steve's glance gave Danny a second to prepare himself for one of the three topics he didn't want to deal with. "Wo Fat went to all that trouble to get here and get that message to me that we needed to talk," Steve said, and it was a testament to how much Danny hated the discussion of Catherine and the limbo she'd left Steve in these days that he was actually relieved by the safer topic of Wo Fat. "It's been a week, and nothing. No message, no sign of him anywhere on the island. Nothing." 

They'd been over this a couple dozen times, at least. "He's Wo Fat," Danny said, as if that explained it. "Who the hell knows what goes on in that head of his?"

"But if it was so urgent--"

"Maybe he's biding his time," Danny said, starting down the list of reasons they'd already covered before. "Maybe he needs money or resources before he feels safe meeting with you. Maybe he is waiting for the right time for some reason. Or maybe," Danny said, pausing for a breath, "just maybe we got really lucky and a coconut fell on his head and killed him."

Steve's eye rolls always looked amusing in profile. "Seriously, Danny, that coconut thing is not true. I don't care how many internet sites you quote."

And yet it never failed to redirect the conversation. "Says you. But 5,386 Google hits say differently."

"Five _million_ Google hits say that New Jersey sucks," Steve said. "That doesn't stop you from proclaiming it to be the greatest thing since sliced bread."

"That's because sliced bread originated in New Jersey, my friend. You can't argue with that."

Steve gave him the Are You Seriously Trying That? face, one of Danny's favorites. "I can and I will," Steve said. "Beers after work--the one who comes up with the most reliable supporting evidence doesn't have to pay."

"You're on," Danny said, "assuming you don't have any phone calls or anything."

Too late he realized he'd just given Steve an opening to talk about Catherine. "No," Steve said, shaking his head. "I got a text last night, just another message that she had a lead on a lead." 

Danny had always liked Catherine, but over the last month he mostly wanted to smack her. He got her noble quest thing and all, he did. But her quest had almost gotten Steve killed, and she wasn't even around to deal with the fallout. She was off tilting at windmills while Danny was the one getting three a.m. phone calls dealing with Steve's nightmares--when he wasn't at Steve's at 3 a.m. anyway--and left with this strange push and pull between them that, but for the constant reminder from Catherine that whatever was between her and Steve was kind of unfinished, might have led to something good over the past few weeks. 

All things considered, her quest might be noble, but it was also really fucking annoying.

Steve's phone rang before Danny could think of a single supportive thing to say. "Chin," Steve answered on the speaker phone.

"We got another email," Chin said. "It specifically mentions the dedication ceremony today."

"Okay, we'll meet you there in five," Steve said, with steel in his tone that, even if Danny hadn't known they were ten minutes out, still would've made him grip the armrest and hold onto his ass.

***

"Far be it from me to argue with Captain America," Sam said, his tone indicating that he would, and frequently did, do just that, "but tell me again what makes you think that the Winter Soldier might be in San Diego?"

Steve's sigh was far more long-suffering than he really felt. He liked that Sam challenged him--it kept him from going off on some wild goose chases in this search. But sometimes it could be a little frustrating. "Because someone purchased the bullets that Bucky always uses."

"So some guy buys some bullets and you immediately book flights to San Diego to see if it was him?"

Steve's sigh was more impatient this time. "Do you have a better lead we should follow?" Because they'd been at this for a couple of months and they had nothing to show for it. He didn't know why he'd expected the search to be faster, like he had some sort of internal compass that led straight to Bucky or something.

If that were true, he'd have known Bucky was alive years ago. 

The fact that he hadn't known still stung, deep down, like a shard of glass he couldn't pull out of his gut. The single most important person left in his life and he'd just let him fall and left him for dead, left him for Hydra to mold into something Bucky would've hated, if he'd known.

Maybe it was better that he didn't know who he'd used to be.

But no, he needed to remember. Needed to have everything that had happened put right. Steve wouldn't stop until he did.

"Hey," Sam said, his hand reassuring on Steve's arm. "Sorry. I just...I know it's frustrating," he said, though Steve could tell that wasn't what he'd intended to say. "I know you want to find him, and this endless road of dead end leads isn't what you wanted."

It was odd, the way Sam understood him so well, like they'd known each other for a lot longer than a couple of months. But then they had been through similar ordeals, even if they'd been over sixty years apart. "Yeah, sorry," Steve said, flashing him a smile. "It's difficult. But I shouldn't take it out on you." 

Sam's shrug was as easy as his smile. "If that was going to drive me away I'd have been gone the first week." 

Steve winced at that. "Am I really that bad?"

"You have your days," Sam said, his tone amused.

"Okay, let's go talk to this guy and see what we find out."

"One, 'Hey, did you happen to sell these to a guy with a metal arm?' coming up."

***

Steve's voice was sharp and clear in Danny's ear as he asked, "Anything?"

Danny scanned the crowd on his side of the stage, but he didn't see anything particularly menacing. It was hot, even for Hawaii, so it wasn't like most people had a lot of clothing to hide guns or bombs. The most clothing award--outside of law enforcement and dignitaries--went to the priest who was there to bless the land. 

"Nothing," Danny replied, hearing Chin and Kono do the same.

"Governor and dignitaries on the move," Steve said.

"Roger that," Danny replied in his best mocking soldier voice, knowing it would give Steve that pinched face that Danny liked to call 'Score One for Jersey.' 

Steve didn't reply, so Danny assumed the Governor and the others were around. That suspicion was confirmed a moment later as the Governor led the way out of the nearby building to the outdoor stage, Steve by his side, scanning the crowd. 

They reached the stage without incident. Steve stood aside once he was on the stage to let the Governor pass by to the podium.

"Dear friends of the university," the Governor started, and Danny tuned the words out, but not the tone, a practice born of necessity during a stint with the Mayor's security detail in Newark. He continued to scan the crowd, including Steve in that scan, seeing nothing out of the ordinary at first.

A few minutes in, though, he saw Steve's face change, saw him looking up, and followed his line of sight to see what had caught his eye. A bright flash of light on a building maybe 200 yards away. A reflection, maybe, but if it was, there shouldn't be anything on top of that building that caused it. They'd been over the area from every angle. 

He didn't hear the shot so much as he heard the sound of the bullet hitting someone, the gasps of the crowd, and the body falling down. Danny turned to see the scientist who had been sitting just to the right of the podium lying on the ground, her bright green top slowly turning red as blood spilled out of a bullet hole. 

Steve was ushering the Governor off the stage, providing cover with his body, the other dignitaries close behind. Danny followed, seeing paramedics rushing onto the stage as he ran by. He didn't stop until he was inside, a few steps behind Steve and Denning.

"Everybody okay?" Danny heard Steve ask.

There was a lot of talking all at once, but Danny got the gist--no one in the room was hit. "Everyone accounted for?"

"Except Dr. Whistler," a tall man in an ill-fitting suit spoke up. "She was shot."

"The paramedics are with her," Danny said, meeting Steve's eyes, feeling the familiar sense of relief that he was okay. 

Chin and Kono checked in on the radio, confirming Danny's suspicion that the sniper had been too far away to get to. They'd only found one shell casing, probably missed by the shooter in his haste to clean up, since there'd been at least three shots. 

That disappointment was quickly followed by even worse news--Dr. Whistler was dead. 

Danny knew the Governor a little by now, knew that he would be feeling some guilt over someone dying in his place. He gave the man a sympathetic smile as he dragged Steve off to the side. "You good?" Danny asked.

Steve nodded. "We need to get Whistler to Max and get ballistics as soon as possible, see if we can get a lead to track this guy down before he tries again. We got lucky this time."

"Tell that to Dr. Whistler."

Steve winced. "Yeah," he said, putting a hand on Danny's shoulder and leaving it there a moment longer than really necessary, but Danny wasn't complaining. "At least with the Governor safe for now, we have a chance at catching the doctor's killer."

Which was one of the things that sucked about their job, but it was better than nothing.

***

Steve watched as Sam slept comfortably in the airplane seat beside him. Sam had no trouble dropping off to sleep on planes anywhere, a talent that Steve envied. It wasn't that Steve minded flying. But when they were flying over oceans, they were completely out of communications range. Nothing that happened in the world could penetrate their sheltered bubble in the plane.

Since New York he'd had trouble coping with going dark. Since the fall of SHIELD, that neuroses had only doubled. He was scared to turn his phone back on at the end of the flight, worried about what kind of horrible thing might've happened in the four hours or so they'd been out of touch between San Diego and Honolulu.

Adding to that worry was the knowledge that the bullets they were tracking had been shipped to Honolulu two days ago. He couldn't escape the feeling that time was running short on this lead. 

Sam jolted awake as the plane touched down, rubbing his eyes before stretching his arms over his head. He glanced down at Steve's hand, where his phone was sitting, and rolled his eyes. 

"Here," Sam said, taking the phone out of Steve's hand and turning it on. He waited for the phone to boot up and checked the texts and the world news. "Nothing," he said. "The world is still--"

He cut off and frowned at the phone tapping the screen and scrolling. "What happened?" Steve asked.

"The world is fine," he said. "But there's been a sniper shooting in Honolulu."

"What?" Steve took the phone, his hope that it was a coincidence rising a little as he read the brief news alert. Shooting at the University of Hawaii, the shooter missed the Governor and hit a scientist sitting beside him. More to come. "It can't be him," Steve said, putting the phone in his pocket as they pulled up to the jet bridge and the seat belt lights went off. "He doesn't miss."

"Maybe he does. He missed his target with Fury."

Steve shook his head. "No, he got the car the first time, Fury just got away. And the second, he hit his target, just not a kill shot. Barely."

"Not getting a kill shot _is_ missing for this guy."

"Bucky," Steve said as he grabbed his bag and stood. He couldn't quite meet Sam's eyes, didn't want to see the look that would be there. "His name is Bucky."

He glanced at Sam's eyes and saw the expression anyway--some odd mix of sympathy and impatience. "Go," Sam said, nodding towards the front of the plane. "Let's see what the cops have to say."

***

Danny poked his head into Steve's office. "Ballistics report is in," he said, turning and heading back to the bullpen, knowing Steve would be right behind. 

Chin and Kono were at the computer table, waiting. "Charlie just sent the report," Kono said, tapping at the screen and swiping some files onto the overheads. "The bullets were Soviet," Kono said. "That much they could tell. And they matched the one casing we found."

"So is that an unused one?" Steve asked, nodding at the screen, where a smooth bullet was pictured.

"No, that's the weird part. That one was pulled from Whistler's body."

Danny frowned. "That's impossible. There's no rifling." 

"That's what's weird," Kono repeated.

Chin swiped something else up onto the screen. "There've been reports," he said, "over the years of an assassin using those bullets. But that's over 50 years. It's more likely a group, or something passed down. There's no way it could be just one person."

"Yes," a voice said from behind them, "it could."

Danny whirled around, hand on his gun, before he saw the speaker was Captain America himself, accompanied by one of the HPD officers who escorted guests to them, and another man Danny thought looked vaguely familiar. "Great," Danny said, "don't tell me this guy's a superhero. No, wait, better, he's an alien, right?"

Before Captain America could respond, Steve stepped forward. "Sam?" he said, moving towards the man Danny couldn't place. "Sam Wilson?"

The man blinked a few times, then his face cleared, a bright smile spreading across it. "Steve McGarrett!" 

Their handshake made Danny want to step between them. "How, exactly," Danny said, "do you two know each other?" 

"Sam saved my life," Steve said. "Our whole team, actually. He and his partner got us out when no other air support could even get close." 

"And this guy almost didn't make it," Sam said, pointing at Steve. "Insisted on the rest of his team getting out first. I barely made it out with him in tow." 

Danny shook his head, totally unsurprised. "That sounds like him," Danny said. 

"I heard about Riley, man," Steve said to Sam, his voice making it clear to Danny what he'd heard. "I'm sorry."

Sam shrugged. "It happens." 

And it still leaves a mark when you lose a partner, Danny thought, seeing that written all over Sam's face. "So now that we know how you two know each other," Danny said, "maybe someone can explain why you," he nodded at Sam, "and Captain America are here and how you know our assassin?"

"Call me Steve," Captain America said.

Danny looked at his Steve, then at Captain America. "That could get a little confusing." 

Captain America shrugged, and Sam rolled his eyes. "Call him Cap, then," Sam said, elbowing Cap in the arm. The look they exchanged made Danny wonder just what their relationship really was, but Cap straightened up and put on what passed for an attempt at a smile. "Sorry, we've taken a lot of plane rides the last couple of days," Sam said, "and his manners tend to disappear." 

Danny couldn't help but laugh at that--looked like Steve really did model himself after Captain America after all. "At least he has them some of the time," Danny said. Steve glared at him, but Danny just gave him a sunny smile.

Steve gave him a look before turning back to their visitors. "This is Danny Williams," he said, nodding at Danny. "And the rest of our team," Steve added, waving a hand at Chin and Kono. "Chin Ho Kelly and Kono Kalakaua."

"Nice to meet you," Cap said, his manners apparently surfacing.

"So what can you tell us about the assassin?" Steve asked. 

"That depends," Cap said, "on whether it's really the man we're looking for." 

"There's more than one person who uses these bullets and manages to do it without any rifling?" Steve asked.

"No," Sam said before Cap could get a word in. 

Danny saw the look they exchanged. "Then why would it not be your guy?"

"Because our guy doesn't miss," Cap said, giving Sam another look.

"Except when he does," Sam said.

Danny pinched the bridge of his nose. They didn't have time for this. "Look, the Governor's life is at stake," he said. "Can we maybe get some idea of what we're dealing with here?"

"You," Cap said, looking at Chin, "were on the right track. The assassin you're talking about is known as the Winter Soldier, right?" 

"Yeah. But all those kills over 50 years?" Chin said. "Couldn't be one guy."

"Why not?" Cap said. "I'm 95."

Chin frowned. "But there's only one of you."

"Apparently not quite," Sam said. 

"Someone else was working on replicating the serum I took," Cap said. "He managed to create an assassin who could be...."

With a look at Cap, Sam picked up the story. "He could be stored and wiped between missions. They kept him in cryo freeze until they needed him, then thawed him out. Once his mission was done, they wiped his memory and froze him again." 

"So the Winter Soldier is real?" Chin said. 

"Pretty much," Sam said. 

Steve had been listening to the exchange with the look that Danny knew meant his bullshit meter was pinging. Or maybe it was just that Danny's was, too. "So what are you not telling us?" Steve asked.

He didn't need the look Sam and Cap exchanged to confirm it, but it did nonetheless. "Not telling you?" Sam said.

"SHIELD no longer exists," Steve said. "So it's not like you're here for a routine check on an assassin. So either this guy is someone SHIELD used to do their dirty work, or he's Hydra. And he clearly means enough to you to go after him despite you being a man without an agency, so to speak."

Cap clenched his jaw together and Danny added another note into the column of how Steve was way too much like Captain America. "Before he was the Winter Soldier," Cap said slowly, "he was Bucky Barnes. My best friend."

Shit. That explained a lot, both now and with what had happened in DC. "So you're here to show an assassin mercy," Steve said, "because he used to be a guy he doesn't even remember?"

"No, I'm here to find my friend, who left Hydra because he was starting to remember."

Danny could tell by Sam's face that whether or not Barnes remembered anything was still very much in question. "Well, if he's trying to kill the Governor," Danny said, "then it doesn't seem very likely that he's remembering he's a good guy."

"Is it possible your Governor is Hydra?" Cap asked.

Danny looked at Steve, then at Chin and Kono, knowing what they were all thinking. "Anything's possible," Danny said finally, since they would all have vouched for Jameson a hundred percent until they realized she was in bed with the Yakuza. "But not likely." 

"Do you have any photos or video from the event?" Cap asked. 

Kono tapped on the computer table. "We have it queued up," she said. "We haven't had a chance to go through it yet." 

"Can we just see the shooting?" Cap asked, giving her a smile and adding a, "Please?" that had Kono beaming and Danny rolling his eyes. Figures, the one time she chooses to be a total girl about someone it would be a superhero. 

She pulled up the video to the right time and let it play. Danny watched as Whistler jumped up a little, as if the bullet had surprised her, before she fell to the ground, as the Steve covered the Governor and started leading people off stage. 

"Can you play it again?" Cap asked, frowning at the screen. Kono played it twice more before Cap pointed. "There," he said, "go back a few seconds."

Kono rewound frame by frame until Cap said, "Stop." He pointed again. "Look at her face--she's looking up towards where the bullet comes from before it hits her. She's getting up just as it hits, like she's trying to get away."

Danny frowned. "That's pretty thin." 

"Do you have any background on her?" Cap asked.

"What are you thinking, Cap?" Sam asked.

Steve answered before Cap could get the words out. "He's thinking that Whistler might've been the target all along."

***

The police were already going through Whistler's files when they got to her office at the University. Cap surveyed the room, knowing that if he just paid close enough attention, if he looked hard enough, he'd--"There," he said, crossing to Whistler's desk. Sam was at his side by the time Cap was able to pull the almost imperceptible door open on the side of the desk. 

Inside the small compartment was a thumb drive. Cap inserted it into the computer on the desk, looking through the files. "I'm no expert," he said, looking up at Sam and the 5-0 task force, "but it doesn't take one to bet that Hydra is all over this research, even if she's scrubbed the name." 

He pulled the thumb drive out and pocketed it. "I'll send it to a contact and confirm." 

"That's evidence," McGarrett said, stepping forward as if to block him. 

"Yes. It is." Cap gave him a level look. "My evidence." 

He thought for a moment that he was going to have a challenge, but Williams took a step forward and said something to McGarrett. After a moment, he backed down. "You'll share your findings?"

"Of course." It wasn't as if SHIELD had the ability to classify things anymore, he thought grimly.

"Good." 

He saw Sam's eye roll, but ignored it. "Why don't you guys join us for dinner in a couple of hours," Sam said, "and we can compare notes on what we've found?" 

Cap was about to add to the invitation, but something outside the window caught his attention. He moved to get a closer look, and got one solid glimpse of a man that made him think he might be cracking up. He blinked, and there was nothing there.

"Cap?" Sam asked, his tone making it clear it wasn't the first time. "You see something?"

He shook his head and moved away from the window. "Must've been a trick of the light," he said. "Let's go make a few calls and see what we can find out about this research." 

***

They'd just pulled into the parking garage at the Hilton when Steve's phone rang. He glanced at the screen, then at Danny. "It's Catherine," he said. "Go on in, I'll be there in a minute." 

"Tell Don Quixote I said hi," Danny muttered as he got out of the car. He had managed to stuff most of his Catherine-shaped issues back down inside by the time he got to the Tropics Bar and spotted Sam. 

"Good to see you again," Sam said as Danny sat down. "Cap's on the phone; he'll be down in a minute. Where's the rest of your team?"

"Chin and Kono have a family thing on the North Shore this weekend, but they're on call if we need them," Danny said. "Steve's in the car, also on the phone."

Clearly not all of his issues were well-hidden. "On the phone?" Sam asked. "Is that a euphemism for something?"

Danny rolled his eyes, pausing to order two Longboards from the waitress before deciding whether or not to answer the question. What the hell, it wasn't like he'd see this guy again after this. "Ex-girlfriend," Danny said. "Or possibly girlfriend. I'm not really clear on that one." 

"Is _he_ clear on that one?" 

"No," Danny said. "He's not."

"Ah."

It was only one word, but it sounded like it had a wealth of understanding behind it. "She's off on some quest to save some kid. Very noble." Danny said. 

"And it's impossible to compete with a noble ideal that's still out there somewhere," Sam added.

Danny looked a little more closely, seeing the understanding there, but seeing more, too. "So what's the deal with Cap and this Bucky guy?" Danny asked, certainty settling in about the problem there when he saw Sam's reaction. 

"Bucky was his best friend," Sam said. "They served together. Cap saved him when he was captured. And then he died," Sam said, taking a drink of his beer. "Or so everybody thought."

"But not so much, I'm guessing, if you think he might be our assassin."

Sam sighed, studying his beer bottle. "Bucky was the Winter Soldier," he said, after a moment. "That part's fact. But what he is now is anyone's guess." 

"Cap thinks he's changed?" 

"Cap thinks Bucky pulled him out of the Potomac."

"And what do you think?"

Sam shook his head. "Doesn't matter what I think. Not to him."

"I'm not asking him." Danny thanked the waitress as she put the beers in front of him, waiting until she was gone before continuing. "I'm asking you." 

"I fought that guy," Sam said. "There was nothing there. He was a machine." 

Danny studied him for a few seconds. "But...?"

"Cap knows him," Sam said. "And after what was done to him...who am I to say he doesn't deserve a chance if he's fought his way back?"

"If he's still killing it doesn't sound like he's fought his way back." 

"If he's killing off Hydra he might have."

Danny took a long drink of his beer. "So if he comes back, where does that leave you?"

Sam raised a shoulder in a half shrug. "Cap has all these stories about before. He talks about things no one else remembers--little things, even, like candy. The other day he was talking about some candy--Abba Dabba candy or something like that--and he realized no one had any idea what he was talking about." 

He took a drink. "I hate the look he gets when that happens. Just like the way he looks when he talks about what it's like to survive that serum. To wake up after being frozen for decades and have the whole world have changed." Sam looked at Danny. "There's only one person on the planet who has any idea what that's like. And it's not me."

Danny got that, more or less. "Steve and Catherine served together," he said. "They're hardwired by the Navy and impossible to pull back sometimes. I get it to a point, but only to a point." 

Danny considered his next story for a moment, but fuck it. He hadn't signed anything saying he couldn't talk about it. "The two of them went off to Afghanistan last month to chase down that kid," Danny said, his voice low. "I barely got Steve back after he was captured, and I still wake up in the middle of the night from nightmares about it going the other way." 

He turned his bottle in his hand. "And I know he'd go back in a heartbeat if he thought he could help. So every time she calls, I think, that's it. I'm gonna wake up tomorrow to a note that he's gone off to rescue her."

"But he hasn't left so far." 

"No." Danny agreed. "He hasn't. And I don't know if it's because he really believes he'll be making it harder for her to work if he does, or if it's because of the nightmares he still has." 

"Nightmares from last month?"

Danny's laugh had no humor to it. "Last month, last year, the year before that." He glanced up at Sam. "Trust me, the guy's got enough nightmare material to last for decades."

"Yeah, I'm familiar." Sam drank the last of his beer and signaled to the waitress. "I...flew," he said. "And one day my partner got shot down right in front of me." 

"Riley?" 

Sam nodded. "Losing a partner makes you question what you're doing there, y'know?"

"I know," Danny said, remembering how Grace's lifeless body felt all these years later. "But you gotta move on, right?"

"You do," Sam said, nodding his head. "Doesn't mean the nightmares go away, though."

Danny saw Steve round the corner to the table and sat up, nodding as Steve made eye contact. Something in his eyes seemed off, though, and Danny watched him carefully as he sat down. His shoulders were rounded, and he wasn't entirely meeting Danny's eyes.

Maybe he'd wait to ask how the call went until they were alone. 

"Any word on the thumb drive we found?" Steve asked.

"Cap was still on the phone with his contact when I came down," Sam said. He looked up towards the door. "Looks like he's done, though." 

Danny looked over his shoulder to see Cap heading towards them, a few eyes in the crowd widening as they realized who he was. He didn't seem to notice, though, he just crossed to their table and sat down next to Sam. "Whistler was Hydra," Cap said. "Hill confirmed it. The research matched something they knew Hydra had been working on but they didn't know where it was coming from."

"Then he didn't miss," Sam said.

"You don't know it was him," Cap shot back.

"Calm down. I meant he in the general sense," Sam said. 

Cap looked like he wasn't sure, but he let it go. "Did you find out anything?" he asked, looking at Steve, then at Danny.

"We interviewed a couple of her research assistants, but they were only working on small parts of it. They had no idea what the overall project was." 

"Hydra was even better than SHIELD at compartmentalization," Cap said. He didn't sound like it was a compliment. "Whoever took her out did the world a favor." 

Danny saw Steve's fist clench. "And nearly killed our Governor in the process," Steve said.

"But he didn't." 

"But he could've. Five people were hurt in the rush to escape after the shooting. Innocent people. What about them?"

"Innocent people get hurt in war," Cap said.

Steve's eyebrows shot up, and Danny braced himself to stop a fight. "You think I don't know that?" Steve said. "But in my experience it's usually because someone goes off thinking they're some kind of god meant to bring vengeance--"

"Okay," Danny said, placing his hand on Steve's forearm. "Dial it down a notch. We're all on the same side here, right?" 

Steve's lips thinned as he looked at Danny a moment before he sighed, and Danny felt some of the anger leave him. Steve gave a short nod. "Right." 

"Good," Danny said. "Then let's order some dinner and talk about how we're going to find whoever this is and do whatever needs to be done." 

They placed an order, and managed conversation well enough until Cap stood suddenly, his attention out on the beach. "Be right back," he said, hurrying out of the restaurant and onto the beach. Danny watched him look around before he slowly made his way back to the table.

"Something wrong?" Danny asked, as Cap sat back down.

"No. I just thought I saw someone I knew."

Danny exchanged a glance with Sam and knew they were thinking the same thing. But since no one had shot at them, Danny let it go.

***

Steve could tell Sam had something on his mind as they went up in the elevator, but Sam was kind enough, or military enough, to wait until they were in Steve's hotel room before questioning him. "What was out on the beach?" Sam asked as soon as they were in the room.

"Nothing." Which was the truth--whatever he'd thought he'd seen, it wasn't there when he'd gotten to the beach. 

"Okay, what did you _think_ was out on the beach." 

He really needed to get better at lying. "I thought I saw someone," he said, moving a few steps away into the center of the room.

"Was it him?" 

Steve shook his head, turning to look at Sam. "I thought I saw Rumlow."

"Rumlow's in DC covered in burns from head to toe."

"But what if he's not?" 

"Dude, I had a front row seat for the crash that burned him. I can barely believe he's alive, and I sure as hell can't believe he's walking around."

Steve would've said the same thing about Bucky for half a century. "What if he had the serum in him?"

Sam's head shake was quick and emphatic. "No way. I fought him. It was nothing like fighting you or...anyone with the serum."

"Okay, maybe someone gave it to him after and it healed his wounds. Maybe he's here cleaning up Hydra's mess."

"Steve...I'm not saying it's impossible, but....it's pretty out there, man." 

Steve turned, looking beyond the curtains to the sliver of view of dark blue sky that ended in black ocean below. It looked so peaceful, and yet he'd crashed into its depths more than once, expecting never to come back again.

A flicker of movement behind the curtain drew his attention, and he ran out onto the balcony, yanking the curtain back. But there was nothing there, only sea breeze causing the curtain to move.

He went back into the room and met Sam's eyes, seeing the sympathy and concern there. He wished he could just accept that, move on, let Sam help him forget the past. 

"Nothing there?" Sam asked softly.

"No." 

"You know, it's not crazy." Still that same voice, soft and careful, like Steve had to be handled with kid gloves. "It's perfectly normal to see--"

"Spare me the analysis, doctor," Steve said, pushing past him. "I'm going for a run." 

***

Danny watched Steve's profile as he drank his beer and looked out at the ocean. He'd known when Steve had joined them at the table that his call with Catherine hadn't gone well, but he'd decided to give Steve until they were home and Danny finished his first beer to talk, before Danny dragged it out of him. And if it was as much because Danny needed the beer to have the conversation, so be it.

When Danny cracked open his second beer, he shifted his body towards Steve. "So what did Catherine have to say?"

Steve's answer was a long time coming, as he finished his beer and put the empty down. "She's run out of leads on her own," he said, his voice strangely flat, a tone Danny usually associated with Doris. "But the CIA offered her some intel, so she's working with them to go after the cell that captured Najib." 

Danny was sure he'd heard wrong. "The CIA?"

Steve nodded, looking out at the ocean, refusing to even look Danny's direction. "She thinks they can help her find him."

Still with that tone, and Danny got why now. He took a deep breath, but it didn't help shove down the anger he felt at the CIA, at Doris, and now at Catherine for what they thought it was okay to do to Steve. And at Steve, for thinking it was okay. He got duty, but this...this was just beyond duty. "So Catherine knows about your mom, and about how she used the CIA to run away, and that was her decision? To go work for them?"

" _With_ them, Danny. Only to find Najib."

"Oh, please, Steven, we both know what working 'with' the CIA really means. You're never really out--just ask your mom. No, wait, you can't! Because she's still off working for the CIA! The same CIA, I might add, that just tried to kill us both not too long ago!"

Danny broke off at the look on Steve's face, one he didn't have a name for, but he recognized it from the early days of their partnership, from every time something reminded Steve of his dad, before the wounds started to heal. The one that said Steve was trying to think of all the ways he could've prevented what happened.

"No," Danny said, his voice quieter, but firm. "No. Absolutely no. You do _not_ get to blame yourself for this. This is _not_ your fault." 

"I never said it was my fault."

"No, but I know that look and I know you, and you're sitting there trying to find a way to take at least some of the blame. And I won't let you." 

Steve shot out of the chair. He took a few steps towards the water, then turned back moving until he was towering over Danny. "They had no choice," Steve said, his voice hoarse. "Catherine has to find Najib. My mom has to stay alive. They had--no, they _have_ no choice." 

"They had the choice not to go in the first place," Danny countered, standing up, inches from Steve, close enough he could feel the harsh, uneven breaths as Steve struggled to keep his control. "You keep defending your mom. You spent half your life defending your dad. And now you're defending Catherine. At what point," Danny asked, holding Steve's gaze, "are you gonna realize that you're better than that? You're worth so much more than a life where people just keep deserting you."

Steve flinched a little. "Not everyone deserts me," he said, his voice quiet now. "You don't desert me. Ever."

The truth of that hit Danny in the gut, more because Steve realized it than just because it was a fact. He'd tried, but he hadn't been able to leave, and he'd stopped fooling himself about the reason a while ago. 

He just hadn't thought Steve had noticed.

The ringing of a phone startled them both. Steve's phone, Danny realized, as Steve took a step back and pulled the phone out of his pocket. Only when he put the phone to his ear did he tear his gaze away from Danny's.

"McGarrett." 

The way every muscle in Steve's body tensed for battle told Danny whoever was on the other end, it wasn't good. "Fine," Steve bit out after a moment, jabbing the screen to end the call. 

"Steve?"

Steve looked at him. "That was Wo Fat. He's named his price for a meet and some answers." 

"What?"

"He wants the serum they used on Captain America."

***

Cap wasn't surprised to see Sam still waiting on him when he got back from his run. "Did you make it to the other end of the island and back?" Sam asked mildly.

Which was just enough to make Cap feel like a jerk. "I'm sorry," he said. 

"I get it," Sam said, waving a dismissive hand at the apology. "And like I said, the idea that Rumlow is in one piece and here is out there...but it's not impossible. I'm just asking you to keep your mind open." 

After a moment, Cap nodded. He was still trying to figure out what to say, though, when there was a knock at the door. He opened it, frowning when he saw McGarrett and Williams there. "Has something happened?" Cap asked.

"Not with the case," McGarrett said. "But...I have a favor to ask." 

Cap could tell the words didn't come easily. "Come in." 

McGarrett came in, Williams close behind. A quick look at Williams' expression told Cap that he was there reluctantly, though why was still a mystery. "We put a guy away," McGarrett said. "Wo Fat. He broke out last month, and I have a chance to meet with him and put him back where he belongs."

"How can I help with that?" Cap asked.

"Wo Fat's price for a meet is the serum that they used on you."

"I wish I could help," Cap said, and he really did. "But there is no more serum." Even as he was saying it, the visions of Rumlow flashed through his mind. "All we had was destroyed the day they gave it to me." 

McGarrett's eyes narrowed as he looked at Cap for a long moment. "Do you have anything that I can offer him? A lead on the formula, anything? I'm not planning on letting him have it, but I need it to get close to him." McGarrett stepped a little closer. "This guy had my father killed and hunted my mother for years," he said. "I need to catch him."

He and McGarrett were a lot alike, he could tell. And he understood what it took for the guy to be this forthright. "I'm really sorry," he said. "We'll help you catch him any way we can. But there is no more serum. SHIELD tried to find it or replicate it for decades with no success. It's gone." 

McGarrett studied him for a moment longer, then nodded. "Okay," he said, nodding again. "Thanks. Sorry to have bothered you." 

"If there's any other way we can help you capture him, let us know." 

With one more nod and a look at Williams, McGarrett strode out the door, leaving Williams to call out a thanks as he followed.

Cap looked over at Sam, who was watching him closely. "What?" 

"You know why he asked you twice, right?" 

"Because he really needs it?" 

"Because you're a terrible liar and it was obvious you were hiding something." 

Cap sighed. "I wasn't hiding anything. I don't have the serum, I don't have any way to get it."

"But you think it exists." 

"Bucky is living proof that Hydra managed to make some version of it," Cap said. "Rumlow was one of their most trusted soldiers. They'd give it to him to repair him and make him stronger if they had it. I know they would."

Sam thought about that for a moment. "Your theory is getting less crazy by the minute," he said, sounding reluctant. 

"Then we need to figure out who shot the Governor and find him before 5-0 does, or they could all be dead." 

***

It was a quiet ride back to Steve's house. Steve didn't talk, and Danny didn't know what to say to break the silence. Part of him really wanted to finish the conversation they'd been having before Wo Fat called, but he knew Steve wasn't in the frame of mind to have it. 

Which left Wo Fat as the obvious topic, but he was pretty sure Steve wouldn't want to hear what Danny had to say on that matter, either. 

It wasn't until they were inside the house that Steve turned to Danny. "How did he know in advance?" he said.

"What?"

"The serum. He couldn't have known I was going to be working with Captain America when he broke out--unless he's the one behind the shooting and he did it in a way sure to get Cap here." 

"Wo Fat's not that good a shot," Danny said.

"No, but he could hire someone who was."

Danny shook his head. "With what money?"

"He has to have some stashed on the island somewhere," Steve said, waving a hand as if logic was insignificant. "Or maybe someone owed him a favor. He's Wo Fat."

Which was a catch all for a whole bunch of inexplicable stuff the guy had managed that normal people could not. "So Wo Fat wants the serum to heal his burns and make him pretty much invincible," Danny said. "So he decides to assassinate someone nobody knew was Hydra, except him, apparently, knowing that it'll get Cap to fly all the way to Hawaii and give him the chance to get you to get the serum from Cap."

Steve looked at him as if that was sane logic. "You got a better idea?"

"Maybe he was just biding his time until you had something he wanted and he saw this opportunity so he took it?"

"Maybe." But Steve didn't sound like he meant it. 

Danny sighed. He knew better than to try to talk logic into Steve where Wo Fat was concerned. "Look," he said. "Let's just--"

Steve's phone rang, and he had it out in a flash, checking the number. He didn't need to say it--Danny could tell from his face that it was Wo Fat. "McGarrett." Steve listened for a moment. "I have it. Ten o'clock. Tantalus. Got it." 

He hung up, and Danny counted to five to try not to yell. "Please tell me," he said slowly, "that you did not just tell Wo Fat you had a serum that doesn't even exist."

"I did not just tell Wo Fat I had a serum that doesn't even exist."

"You are not funny."

Steve put his hands out. "What was I supposed to do, Danny? We have to catch him. Do you know something else he wants?" 

"You, dead?"

"If he wanted me dead, I'd be dead. No," Steve said, putting a hand up, "don't argue with me--look how many chances he's had. He doesn't want me dead." 

Yet. "Until he's done with you," Danny said. "Then what?" 

That muscle in Steve's jaw that spelled nothing but trouble was jumping as he took a deep, loud breath through his nostrils. "I have to go meet him," he said, looking at his watch. 

"Fine. I'm coming along." 

"He said come alone."

"Of course he did. I know you are not nearly as stupid as you sound right now."

"Danny--"

"Steve! I am _not_ letting you go alone." 

The muscle was working overtime. "Fine," Steve ground out after a moment. 

"And we should call for backup." 

"You are my backup." 

Yeah, that helped. Because the last time he said that, Danny ended up being shot and blown backwards off a porch. "You are a menace." 

"Kinda makes you wonder why you want to save me," Steve said, raising an eyebrow, some of his humor returning now that he'd more or less won the argument.

"You're telling me." 

"Let me grab a few things and we can go." 

Steve ran off to the garage, and Danny pulled out his phone. Chin and Kono were on the North Shore and would never make it back in time. He started to call them anyway, then remembered Cap's offer to help.

It would be a hell of a lot harder for Wo Fat to escape from Captain America. Might also sell the serum lie if Cap was discovered.

Checking over his shoulder to see if Steve was in sight, Danny sent a quick text to Sam.

***

"You're sure this is the place?" Cap whispered. 

Sam checked his phone's GPS. "As sure as I can be without SHIELD's equipment to back me up, yeah," he whispered back. 

For all that SHIELD clearly had to go, Cap missed the resources, too. "I don't see--wait." He crept closer to the edge of the tree line, catching a glimpse of movement on the other side. "There." 

He watched as McGarrett and Williams approached an Asian man of indeterminate age, at least in the moonlight and at this distance. 

"I thought I told you to come alone," the man, who Cap assumed was Wo Fat, said.

"I guess I don't take directions as well as McGarrett here does," Williams said, jerking a thumb at McGarrett. 

Wo Fat looked at Williams, then back at McGarrett. "You have the serum?" he asked. 

"You first," McGarrett said.

Clearly he'd lied to Wo Fat about having it to get the meeting. Because lying to criminals that you have what they want worked out so well. 

Wo Fat studied McGarrett for a moment. "You don't have it." 

"I'm not stupid. I don't have it on me." Cap had to hand it to McGarrett, he was good. Cap would've probably bought the lie if he didn't know for a fact McGarrett didn't have it. "You tell me what I want to know, though, and I'll go get it." 

There was a long, tense pause before Wo Fat said, "You're lying." He took a step back and pulled out a gun, aiming it at McGarrett.

Cap threw his shield, knocking the gun out of Wo Fat's hand as Cap ran out to stop him before he could get away. He had Wo Fat on the ground in a few seconds, face down, his hands trapped in one of Cap's. "Got any cuffs?" he asked, looking up at McGarrett and Williams. 

McGarrett gave Williams a look that made Cap glad he wasn't planning on being around for whatever discussion they had later. "Here," McGarrett said, pulling out a zip tie and handing it over.

Cap secured Wo Fat's hands and helped him up, handing him over to Williams. "Need any help with him?" Cap asked.

"I can take it from here," Williams said. "Thanks." 

Movement at the edge of the clearing caught Cap's eye, and he turned to catch the end of what looked like a person disappearing into the trees. He ran into the woods, chasing after whatever had moved, but when he stopped, there was no sign of anything other than trees. 

He looked around and listened for a minute, but there was nothing. Already dreading the conversation with Sam, he headed back out to where everyone was still standing, watching him. "See something?" Sam asked.

"I thought I did," Cap replied. "Must've been a trick of the light," he said, before turning to McGarrett. "We'll meet you at your headquarters." 

McGarrett looked like he might argue, but Williams got in there first. "See you there," he said, dragging Wo Fat, and by extension, McGarrett, towards their car.

***

The drive back was eerily quiet. Steve kept one eye on the road and one in the rear view mirror, trained on Wo Fat. Danny mostly kept both eyes on Wo Fat. 

They'd just locked Wo Fat in the rendition room when Cap and Sam showed up. "Thanks for letting us come back here," Cap said. "I didn't want to give anything away in front of your guy, but there's a chance he might know something about the assassin."

"We thought the same thing," Danny said, ignoring Steve's glare. 

"What made you think so?" Steve asked after a moment, as if he was giving away a state secret just by asking a question.

After a nudge from Sam, Cap sighed. "I wasn't lying about the serum," he said. "We don't have it. Haven't since they gave it to me. But there is a chance that Hydra had something similar."

"The assassin has super serum?" Danny asked. "Great. That's fantastic." 

"We don't know who the assassin is yet," Cap said. 

"So there's more than one super serum-fueled assassin running around?" Danny said, making a face. "Even better. What next, the president is actually Hydra?"

Sam put his hand on Cap's arm. "Hydra had a soldier," Sam said, "high up in their command, named Rumlow. He was burned in the Insight helicarrier wrecks at the Triskelion. Burned bad, too. All over. Last we heard he was in a coma in a military hospital under heavy guard."

"You think he got the serum and is all better and out shooting people?" Danny asked.

"We don't know anything yet," Cap said. "I have a call in asking someone to make sure he's where he's supposed to be. But...it's possible."

Steve had been standing beside Danny silently, but radiating tension out of every pore. "Why?" he asked.

"Why what?"

"Why do you think that he might be here and on the serum?"

Cap glanced at Sam before he said, "I thought I saw him a few times. At Whistler's office, on the beach, tonight when you captured Wo Fat."

"And you didn't think to tell us until now?" Steve asked.

"It was impossible," Cap said. "It couldn't have been him. So I dismissed it as my mind playing tricks on me."

"And now you think differently?" Danny asked.

"Maybe. I don't know." Cap shrugged. "There's enough of a question there that I'd like to talk to Wo Fat and see if he knows the guy."

Steve laughed. "He won't tell you anything." 

"He might."

"If you have a blow torch, maybe," Steve said. 

Danny's eyes darted to Steve's face, but there was no emotion there. "It wouldn't hurt to let him have a chance," Danny said to Steve.

Steve frowned at him, then shrugged. "Fine. Take your best shot." 

"Come on," Danny said. "I'll take you down there." 

He led Cap and Sam down to the rendition room. Cap went in, but Sam stayed outside with Danny to watch through the mirror. Wo Fat raised an eyebrow as Cap walked in, a smug smirk totally out of place for someone who was tied to a chair in police custody. 

"Who are you working with?" Cap asked.

"Do you have the serum?" Wo Fat replied.

Cap waited for a moment. "No."

Wo Fat didn't waste another breath. He just stared ahead in response to the rest of Cap's questions until Cap came back out of the room. "Are you sure he's not Hydra?" Cap asked.

"No," Danny said honestly. Because he wouldn't put it past Wo Fat to use Hydra for all he could get from them. "But if he is, he's got no loyalty to them." 

"Why?"

"Because his only loyalty is to himself. He'll work with anyone who can help him, but he'll turn on them in a second if someone else can help him more." 

"At least you have him in custody," Sam said.

"For now."

Cap frowned. "For now?"

"He's broken out of every prison we've put him in. Even the ones you can't break out of." 

Cap thought for a moment. "I need to make a call," he said, pulling out his cell phone. 

***

"Come on, Hill," Cap said quietly into the phone, "I know Stark has to have some place to shove this guy. Or at least an idea how he can make it so the guy can't break out." 

He heard Hill's long sigh, and knew he'd won. "I'll see what I can do." 

"Thanks. I owe you one."

"One?" She laughed. "You wish." 

He laughed with her as he hung up and joined the others in the main room. "I'm sorry I couldn't get him to talk," Cap said. "But I may have a lead on a place he can't break out of, if that helps."

"Hell has an opening?" Williams said. 

"Not quite. SHIELD facilities are all out of the question now, obviously, but I know someone who might be able to help. I'll let you know as soon as I hear back."

"Thanks," Williams said. After a nudge from Williams, McGarrett echoed the thanks. 

Cap nodded. "Least I can do. Thank you for letting me talk to him." He nodded to Sam. "We should go. I'll be in touch tomorrow once I've heard back."

***


	2. Chapter 2

Danny wasn't stupid. He'd known the price of calling Cap and Sam against Steve's wishes, just as he'd known he had no other choice. He'd gladly pay the price as long as it meant Steve was still around to yell at him. 

He wouldn't be the one to start the fight, though. So he remained silent in the car all the way to Steve's, despite Steve's tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, despite the increasingly obnoxious music choices Steve made, all designed to annoy the hell out of Danny. 

Steve waited until they were in the house, though--never a good sign--until he finally turned around to face Danny. "I can't believe you called them."

"Really? Why is that? Because the great Steve McGarrett forbade it?" Danny laughed. "News flash--we are not your subjects. We are allowed to think for ourselves." 

"We could've handled it." 

"Really? Did you see him pull a gun on you? Because I did." 

Steve's eye roll just made Danny more annoyed. "I had it under control." 

"Oh, I'm sorry, you had it under control? When he had the jump on you with his gun and you had no cover and were, what, six feet from him?" 

"He didn't have the jump on me." 

"Close enough." Danny moved forward, invading Steve's space, which was rarely a problem, until it was, for various reasons. "You understand that you are not bullet proof, right?"

"Danny--"

"No, really, Steve, I just want to make sure you're clear on that fact. Because I can go back and list your injuries from Afghanistan."

"Danny--"

"I am not done!" Danny took a breath. "Broken nose, collar bone fracture, sixteen stitches all together in various places, more bruises and swelling than I can really recount right now." 

Steve put a hand on Danny's arm, but Danny shook him off, not backing down. "And we can go back to North Korea if you want a more Wo Fat-specific example, Steve. How many burns did they have to treat after that, huh? I can tell you how many. Fourteen. Fourteen burns. How close was Wo Fat to killing you then?" 

"Danny--"

"No! I'm not stopping until you get that I have traveled to places that I never wanted to visit in my lifetime just to get you back. I did not go to North Korea and Afghanistan to save your ass just to lose you in my backyard! Do you get that?" 

Steve blinked a couple of times. "Can I speak now?"

"Yes!"

Steve took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm sorry."

"What?" Danny could barely believe his ears. 

"I'm sorry," Steve repeated. "I just...I'm used to doing the job because I could. Because I had nothing to lose, and that made me effective." 

Seriously, this guy was going to give Danny a stroke. "Nothing to lose? Really? You have nothing to lose?" 

"Danny--"

"So 5-0, our team? That's nothing? Grace is nothing? _I'm_ nothing? That's why you act that way, because you think you have nothing to lose?"

"No--stop, just listen to me, okay? I _had_ nothing to lose. That's what I'm used to. And when I'm threatened, it's my default. It's what I go back to because it's how I have always done my job." 

Danny's laugh was anything but funny. "So, what, I'm just supposed to accept that because it's your default setting?"

"No. I'm saying that's what I do." Steve stepped a little closer. "But I trust you to pull me back from it when I need it, even when I'm an ass about it." 

As apologies go, that was about the best one Steve McGarrett was going to give, Danny figured. "So am I forgiven for calling in the cavalry?" 

"There's nothing to forgive." 

"Good," Danny said, smoothing his hair back. "So does that mean next time you run off like there's nobody who cares if you leave, you'll understand if I club you over the head and drag you back here?" 

Steve laughed. "There are more effective ways to keep me from running away."

"Yeah, but if I locked you in the rendition room you'd find a way out." 

"Danny?"

"Yeah?"

"Stop talking."

Danny was about to do the exact opposite when his mouth was captured in a kiss that robbed him of all his words. He froze for half a second as it registered that Steve was actually kissing him, that Steve's arm was snaking around his back and pulling him closer.

Then his brain caught up, and he kissed Steve back.

His brain was apparently slow on the uptake in general, because it wasn't until Steve let him up for air that Danny thought to protest. "Seriously?" he said, though there was no sting to the word and he didn't bother to pull his fingers out from where they were trying very hard to weave themselves into the short hair at the nape of Steve's neck. " _Now_ you decide to do this? Seriously?"

Steve's eyebrows drew together, and Danny knew he was screwed when he thought it was adorable instead of annoying. "Just to be clear," Steve said, "it's the timing you have an issue with and not doing this?"

"I need my head examined for not having a problem with doing this," Danny said, though the words only made Steve grin. "I just...you...Catherine...." Danny dropped his hands to Steve's waist, but still didn't pull away. "Five minutes after she joins the CIA, you decide to kiss me. It feels a little like the time Betty Zaver decided to get back at her boyfriend by making out with me at a party, you know?"

"Is that what you think this is?" Steve asked, his eyebrows practically meeting each other over his nose. "Revenge kissing?"

"Is it?"

Steve took a deep breath. "Danny," he said, the words halting, like he was having to search for them, "I have wanted to do this forever. But I was with Catherine, and you had Rachel, then Gabby, then Amber...the timing was always wrong."

"Catherine's still out there on her mission," Danny reminded him, his body protesting his attempts to thwart what it desperately wanted, especially when he was still somewhat pressed against Steve, but he had to do this right, or they'd both end up in pieces scattered all over the island.

Well, they might end up that way anyway, but this way at least they had a chance.

"Catherine made her choice," Steve said, and while there was some hurt there--as there would be with anyone who deserted him to the CIA--there was no anger. No sign of a thirst for revenge. "Her choice just made it easier for me to do what I've been itching to do anyway, and I didn't want to waste any more time." One corner of Steve's mouth quirked up. "Besides, I had to move fast. You and Amber broke up a week ago--if I waited much longer someone else might've moved in on you."

Danny had to laugh at that, because there wasn't a lot of chance of that. He'd realized over the last few weeks that the main reason things hadn't worked out with Gabby or with Amber was Steve. As long as Steve was there, no one else could hold Danny's interest for long. 

No one else could compare.

"You're sure about this?" Danny asked, meeting Steve's eyes. Because this had to be certain. Too many other things would be destroyed if they were wrong about this.

"Yeah," Steve said softly, a hint of a smile in his eyes, for all that he was deadly serious. "Yeah, I'm sure." His eyes narrowed as he studied Danny. "Are you?"

"Yeah," Danny said, his arms sliding around Steve's back, pulling him closer. "I'm sure."

Steve's smile was blinding. "Good," he said. "Now can we go back to the kissing?"

Danny leaned in for a kiss, then another, then another, his hands moving lower, feeling their way along that spectacular ass he'd been admiring for the last four years. He lost track of time, but when Steve muttered "up...stairs" between kisses, Danny realized his hands were inside Steve's pants, getting intimately acquainted with Steve's bare ass. 

Yeah, upstairs was definitely the right idea. As soon as Danny could bring himself to get his hands out of Steve's pants. 

"Upstairs," Steve said against Danny's mouth. "Danny...fuck...." 

The need in Steve's voice, combined with the way his dick was hard and needy, pushing against Danny's stomach through their clothes, gave Danny the ability to let Steve go. He pulled out of Steve's arms, only to push Steve towards the stairs. "Go."

Steve went, grabbing Danny's wrist to pull him along, as if he wasn't going to be as close behind as he could possibly get. The stairs gave Danny a fantastic view of that amazing ass, and he had to bite his lip to restrain the urge to touch again, knowing it would only slow them down.

They reached the bedroom at last, Steve turning around to pull Danny in as he was still backing his way through the room to the bed. Steve stopped them at the edge of the bed, tugging at Danny's clothes in between kisses, pulling them off with the least amount of coordination Danny had ever seen Steve show. 

He couldn't help laughing, which made Steve pause and frown at him. "What?"

"Nothing," Danny said, shaking his head as he pulled Steve into another kiss, this one slower and more deliberate. Steve's hands were slower and more sure as he went back to working on Danny's clothes, Danny returning the favor. 

They finally managed to get everything off, and that first full contact of skin on skin made Danny gasp into Steve's mouth. "Bed," he said, shoving Steve back so he fell onto the bed behind him. Steve scooted backwards up the bed, the look he gave Danny so hot Danny could swear he could feel it. 

Danny climbed onto the bed, throwing one leg over both of Steve's to sit on his thighs. He took a moment to appreciate the view, Steve naked and hard, laid out beneath him, better than every wet dream Danny had had about him over the years. 

"What?" Steve asked.

"What what?"

"That look," Steve said.

Danny shrugged. "Just trying to figure out where to start."

"I have an idea," Steve said, and then his hand was on Danny's dick, a little rough, but still so good, just because it was Steve. Danny pushed into it, loving the way it made Steve's eyes narrow, his tongue peeking out to wet his lips. The friction of Steve's thighs under Danny's ass as he moved made it that much better. 

Danny couldn't stop a little growl as Steve let go of his dick. But when he saw Steve reach into the nightstand and grab a tube--without looking, the freaky Ninja--Danny got the idea. Steve's eyes never wavered from Danny's face, even as Steve slicked up his hand before putting it back on Danny's dick. 

This was perfection, Danny thought, absolute perfection. He quickly realized he was wrong, when Steve opened his hand wider to wrap it around both his and Danny's dicks together. The warm, strong channel of Steve's hand, the slide of his dick against Danny's, combined with the look in Steve's eyes, and the way his breath was hitching every time Danny pushed just a little harder against him, was going to get Danny off in a hurry.

He didn't want it to end, though, didn't want to lose the way it felt as his ass dragged along Steve's legs, the way the room smelled of sex and Steve, the way Steve looked at Danny like this might actually be better than even the Navy itself, he wanted it all to last forever.

It couldn't, though, as his whole body was zinging with pleasure, streaking through his muscles and nerves from every direction, all with one common destination. He struggled to hold out, but he broke first, crying out at his release as he felt Steve's hand speed up then slow, jerky motions matching the ones Steve's body made beneath him before he stilled.

Danny collapsed onto Steve, tasting the sweat on Steve's neck as he focused on breathing. When he started to cool down, he slid off to the side just a little, half his body still covering Steve's. 

"I suppose I should think about going home," Danny murmured, not moving, and not really wanting to, but not wanting to set off any commitment-phobia issues Steve might have lying around in that bizarre psyche of his. 

Danny felt Steve tense. "You could," he said, with a lightness that every muscle in his body said he didn't feel. "Or you could stay."

"Didn't really want to leave anyway," Danny said, settling in a little more comfortably. He smiled against Steve's chest as he felt Steve relax.

***

_It happened so fast. One second Bucky was there, the next he was gone. Steve stared out into the cold, snowy expanse below the plane, but there was nothing._

_Bucky was dead._

_Except he wasn't, he came running down through the plane suddenly, with a metal arm and Bucky's face, but no recognition in his eyes, nothing but a blank look, spouting someone else's words about a mission as he raised his metal fist to knock Steve out of the plane._

Steve woke to the gut-wrenching dread of someone about to be punched, but the room was quiet, only the peaceful sound of the ocean for background noise. Right. Hawaii. Not Europe. Not DC. He was in Honolulu. Alone.

No, he realized, suddenly catching onto what woke him up, he was not alone. There was someone in the room. Whoever it was must not be planning to kill him in his sleep, because he was awake and they still hadn't made a move. They were just standing there, breathing so quietly he almost missed it. 

His shield was beside the bed, so he grabbed it as he jumped up into a defensive position to get a good look.

Rumlow stood near the open balcony, clearly visible in the moonlight, and clearly not scarred. He blinked, eyes widening as Steve moved forward. Rumlow darted for the balcony, and by the time Steve made it to the ledge, he could see Rumlow hitting the ground four stories below. 

Steve followed, staying far enough back that he hopefully wouldn't be seen. If Rumlow had the serum, and that was a likely if, given the lack of scars and his ability to easy jump forty feet, Steve didn't want to cause a scene that might take out a few blocks of downtown Honolulu. 

He picked up the pace when he saw Rumlow get into a pickup truck. Steve managed to hop onto the back and stay out of sight until they were out of traffic. When it was safe, he crawled into the bed of the truck and lay down flat, waiting to see where Rumlow was going. 

They left the city, and the road quieted down and became darker, only sporadic street lights, then no street lights at all as they turned into a wooded area. Eventually the truck stopped and turned off, and Steve heard the door open and close. 

He waited until he couldn't hear footsteps to raise his head just high enough to see over the side of the truck bed. He could barely make out the shadowy figure of Rumlow in the distance, walking towards a small building. No, he realized, as Rumlow disappeared inside and the building lit up, a tent. It reminded Steve of the tents they'd had during the war, only lighter, as if someone had made that concession to bounce some of the Hawaiian sun off the tent and keep it cool during the day.

Steve watched for a few minutes, but he heard no voices, and only saw one shadow moving around in the tent. He wasn't going to get a better opportunity to get some answers than this, so he hopped out of the truck, shield at the ready, and made a bee line for the tent. 

He pulled back the tent flap and stepped inside, his words dying on his lips at the glint of a metal arm in the lantern light. "Bucky?"

Bucky looked around, as if trying to find an exit, before realizing that the only one was behind Steve. His metal fist clenched as he swallowed. "What are you doing here?"he asked.

Steve blinked at him. "What am I doing here? I followed Rumlow here, and came in to find you instead. So I think the better question is what are you doing here?"

Too late Steve realized the obvious answer, his stomach dropping. If Bucky was here, then he was likely the assassin they were chasing. "Whistler," Steve said, suddenly hoarse. "You killed her."

"It wasn't me," Bucky said quickly, hands up, as if he was surrendering. "I would've," he added. "I mean, the bitch was Hydra. She deserved it. But it wasn't me."

Good to know that Bucky at least knew enough to hate Hydra. "Then what are you doing here?"

"I've been laying low," he said, dropping his hands, looking unsure and a little trapped in the middle of the tent, "trying to figure out who I am." The self-deprecating smile was so Bucky that Steve's heart ached. "I figured nobody would be looking for a guy with a metal arm in the most sleeveless place in the country."

"But you weren't you," Steve said. "I saw you. You were Rumlow."

Bucky's smile widened, and Steve really needed to get a grip, because it made him want things he'd been trying to forget for decades. Things that were long dead, even if Bucky wasn't. "Your Russian friend left her outfit behind in DC," he said, holding up a pile of thin fabric.

No, not fabric, Steve realized, at least not regular fabric. He recognized it as the holographic disguise device Natasha had used the day Insight launched. It was how she'd gone undercover as the Councilwoman. "So you thought Rumlow was the obvious choice for lying low?" 

Bucky shrugged, putting the disguise down on the small crate he was using as a table. "Nobody's looking for him," he said. "He was the least obvious of the options the suit had programmed into it. And I don't go into town much. Just when I need supplies."

"You must've needed supplies a lot the last day or so," Steve said. "Or are you going to tell me that wasn't you at the university, or the Hilton earlier?"

Steve knew that look, and it made him hope, seeing Bucky's old expressions showing through the blank mask he'd been in DC. That was the look Bucky got when he was caught out. "I heard about the shooting, and wondered who was killing off Hydra and trying to frame me for it. Then...." He shrugged and ducked his head, darting glances up at Steve through his hair. "I saw you. At Whistler's office."

"So, what, you decided to make me think I was either crazy or in danger because Rumlow was stalking me?"

Bucky bit his lip. "That wasn't--I mean...." He sighed. "I wanted to see you," he said, stepping closer, and Steve felt like the air was leaving the tent with every step. "I wanted to...." He stopped less than a foot away from Steve. "My memories are all jumbled," Bucky said. "I thought maybe seeing you would put them together. Connect some dots in my head."

"Did it help?"

"I remember more," he said slowly. "But it's like...I don't know what's real and what was just...wishing."

"Wishing?"

Bucky nodded, moving closer still, and Steve felt the instinct to move away and move closer all at once, leaving him frozen in place until Bucky's hands were on his hips, and Bucky's lips were on Steve's. The kiss was amazing. So much better than the clumsy few kisses they'd shared as kids, filling all the promise that those kisses had hinted at of something wonderful ahead. 

Bucky lifted his head, searching Steve's eyes. "Were we like this? Before?"

Steve felt the familiar mix of want and shame from decades ago, of feeling things, doing things that the world said were wrong. But it was a new day in America. And wasn't freedom what he'd been fighting for?

"Yeah. I mean, kinda. When we were teens, before...." Before the war made them men who should know better.

But his heart had never learned that lesson.

A frown crossed Bucky's face. "Sofa cushions..." he said slowly, like a memory was slowly returning, one that still fueled some of Steve's better dreams. His smile said the memory had returned, or at least enough of it that he was more confident in leaning down for another kiss.

For the first time, Steve understood why kissing Nat had felt good, but wrong at the same time. This felt like what he'd been made for, not just someone who got him, who knew the scrawny kid that lived inside the giant perfect specimen the world saw, but someone who had the same strength. Nat had felt like she would break if he held on too hard, even though he knew she could hold her own in a fight.

He hadn't lied when he'd told her she wasn't his first kiss since the forties. He'd had a lot of offers--he was Captain America, and he wasn't as blind as he tried to pretend to what that meant to some people, to the ones who only saw him as that, and never as Steve Rogers. He'd even kissed a few of them, trying to 'move on' or 'join the 21st century' or whatever people kept spouting at him.

He'd always pulled back, though, using old fashioned chivalry as his excuse so they didn't feel bad. But it was only part of the truth. Underneath that veil of a moral code lay the real truth--he could hurt someone if he lost control. 

Bucky felt like he could take whatever Steve could dish out, accidentally or on purpose. 

Bucky broke the kiss, lifting his head and looking down at Steve, a small frown marring his face. "Hey. You with me here?"

"Yeah," Steve said, already pulling him back in. "Yeah, I'm with you."

Whatever romanticized notion he'd had of what this should be like, clothes melting away, falling onto a bed, it was quickly dispelled as Bucky's buttons refused to budge and Steve found that he couldn't actually get out of his pants and keep touching Bucky at the same time. But they managed, at last, to be naked and on the makeshift bed at the far end of the tent. 

The rub of bare skin against his own had Steve gasping, as Bucky covered Steve's body, his lips finding Steve's again. Steve had to run his hand down Bucky's back, feeling the muscles move under his skin, hesitating only slightly when he reached Bucky's lower back before delving further. 

The first touch of cold metal made Steve shiver, as Bucky's metal arm brushed Steve's side. Bucky broke off the kiss and lifted his head, looking down at Steve with an expression that Steve knew all too well. Bucky had worn it the time he'd accidentally broken Steve's favorite toy when they were six, and every time he was worried Steve would be upset with him since. 

Steve met Bucky's eyes before shifting, pulling Bucky's weight more firmly on top of his own body, shivering again as their cocks brushed against each other. Steve took Bucky's metal hand in his, pulling it up and placing it on the side of Steve's face, palm open, and holding it there. 

After a moment, Bucky's worried expression straightened out until a bright, beautiful grin spread across his face. Steve could feel his own answering grin widening, until Bucky ducked his head and captured Steve's mouth once more. 

Steve quickly acclimated to the touch of metal, warm now from his skin, as they moved together, their bodies slick with sweat, cocks trapped between them, brushing against skin and each other. It was messy, and clumsy, and should've been embarrassing and not at all arousing. Instead it was the single most arousing thing Steve had ever experienced. 

He didn't want it to end, but his body had other ideas, as he moved faster in response to Bucky's increasing urgency. Bucky let go of Steve's mouth to taste his neck, causing Steve to grip Bucky's ass in a way that would've probably maimed any other person on the planet. 

It made Bucky gasp against Steve's neck and speed up, and Steve couldn't stop himself from falling over the edge at that reaction. He was vaguely aware of Bucky crying out and stilling as Steve caught his breath, and by the time he was really aware of everything around him again, Bucky was still, his face buried in Steve's neck.

Steve ran his hand up and down Bucky's back slowly, his mind quiet for the first time in so long it was almost embarrassing to try to count. It was certainly the first time since the Winter Soldier mask had hit the ground in the middle of their fight, revealing Bucky's face. 

He'd never quite be free of the guilt he felt for not being able to save Bucky sooner. But for the first time he felt like it might be okay in the end. And he'd learned lately that sometimes okay was the best win you could get. 

Bucky pushed up at last, dropping a lingering kiss on Steve's lips before he stood. Steve watched him walk across the room, taking the time to appreciate the view as Bucky cleaned himself up. His mouth went dry as Bucky came back to the cot, cloth in hand. He cleaned Steve up and tossed the cloth on the ground before draping himself partly over Steve's body once more. 

Steve didn't miss the way Bucky laid so his metal arm was off the cot. After all that, did he really still think that it would bother Steve? Or maybe it just bothered Bucky. Either way, Steve wasn't having it. He shifted, pulling Bucky over to the other side of the cot, but leaving him only enough room to slide halfway off. Bucky's left arm lay across Steve's chest, the metal no longer feeling strange at all there. 

Before Bucky could get any crazy notions about it, Steve laid his own arm across the metal, turned into Bucky's warmth, and closed his eyes to find some sleep.

***

Consciousness was unwelcome, but persistent. Danny buried his face against Steve's sleeve, but his mind had woken up enough now to start racing, and it wasn't slowing down just because he wanted to sleep. 

They were crazy to even start this, he knew. If Paula Deen put out a recipe book for disaster, the two of them would be the cover dish. But he couldn't imagine not doing it, not now, not after tonight. Didn't want to imagine losing this now that he knew what Steve tasted like, what he sounded like in bed, how he felt when he shivered into a million pieces. 

Danny had fought tooth and nail in the past for a lot less than this. 

Now if they could just keep from fucking it up, and from fucking up their partnership in the process. He didn't exactly have the best track record, and Steve really didn't have a track record at all. Catherine didn't count. She'd spent her entire time with Steve tip toeing around trying not to scare him, and gotten nowhere. 

Danny wasn't the tiptoe type.

Steve started muttering, muscles stiffening as he made twitchy little movements, as if he was dreaming about much bigger ones but somewhere his brain knew he couldn't make them in his current place. 

"Danny...."

The word was muttered, but with that tone it might as well have been screamed out. Danny didn't need a psych degree to get the idea about what was going on in Steve's head. "Hey," Danny murmured, lips close to Steve's ear, staying close, but ready to roll away fast if Steve started thrashing. Danny had learned that lesson on Steve's couch years ago after North Korea. "Steven. It's okay. Wake up."

Steve shuddered, eyes blinking open as they darted around. "Danny?"

"Yeah, right here babe. All in one piece."

Steve's breathing slowed down a little as he rolled onto his side to pull Danny close, ducking his head until his nose was pressed against Danny's neck. He stayed that way, breathing Danny in for a moment before letting go a little, pulling back enough to look at Danny. "What time is it?"

"Almost four. You okay?"

"Yeah, fine."

"You know," Danny said, hand stroking soothingly down Steve's spine, "normally I'd smack you for lying to me, but under the circumstances I'll cut you some slack if you talk to me."

Steve's lips thinned for a moment. "It was just a nightmare," he said at last. "That's all."

"What happened?"

"You died." 

The words were flat, toneless, Steve's robotic form of coping that Danny had way too much experience with. "But I'm still here."

"I know. Like I said, just a dream."

Danny studied him for a long time. "You know I'm not going anywhere," Danny said. "Right?"

Steve opened his mouth, then closed it again, as if choosing his words. "Are you going to tell me you weren't lying awake wondering what was going to go wrong with us?" he said finally. Before Danny could answer, Steve said, "You don't have to say it, I can see it all over your face."

"Wasn't going to deny it," Danny said, because what would be the point? He'd told Steve that's what he always did. "Doesn't mean I really think things will go south."

"But you can't control what your subconscious throws up in your face," Steve said. "Any more than I can stop mine from throwing the dreams at me." Steve's arm tightened around Danny. "Everyone's left me," Steve said, "willingly or not. And I know you'd never leave willingly. Doesn't mean that my brain isn't going to stop worrying about it, any more than yours. But I'm not giving in to fear."

Danny huffed out a quiet laugh. "Like you'd even know how to give in to fear?"

Steve's shrug wasn't nearly as careless as he had probably hoped. "When it comes to losing people I love," he said, his eyes on Danny's nose, "fear can be pretty strong."

He knew what it cost Steve to even have this conversation, and it wasn't exactly Danny's idea of a good time, either. But it needed to be faced up front if they were going to do this. "I'll make you a deal," Danny said, ducking his head a little and forcing Steve to meet his eyes. "I'll tell myself every morning that this isn't going to go south, that it'll be fine, if you tell yourself I'm never leaving."

A hint of a smile started to show on Steve's face. "That might make it a little difficult to do our jobs if we never leave this bed. "

Danny rolled his eyes. "Haha. Very funny," he said, before he pulled Steve just a little closer. "I am serious, though. Do we have a deal?"

"Yeah," Steve said, his voice and his eyes both soft. "Yeah. We have a deal."

***

A gut-wrenching scream woke Cap from a sound sleep. He was sitting up and reaching for his shield before he realized there was no danger. Bucky was having a nightmare. Or, rather, he had been having a nightmare. His scream had woken him up as well. 

Bucky's eyes were wide, his chest moving rapidly as he gulped in air. Steve realized that Bucky had a death grip on Steve's arm, thankfully his real hand, not his metal one. Dropping his shield back to the ground beside the bed, Steve put his hand over Bucky's. "You okay?"

His nod was more of a slight jerk of his head than anything else. "Sorry."

Steve shook his head. "Nothing to be sorry about," he said, quietly. "Nightmare?" he asked, though he was pretty sure of the answer. 

"Yeah." 

He could tell Bucky was trying to hide how shaken up he was, but Steve still knew him too well. "Yeah, I have my fair share of them," Steve said. "Mine are quieter. More internal. But they still wake me up in a cold sweat."

"What do you dream about?"

It might be easier to answer what he doesn't dream about. "The war," Steve said. "Crashing into the water. New York. DC." He left out one of the worst nightmares, the one where Bucky's falling out of the train over and over again, ripping Steve's heart to shreds a little more each time. "What about you?"

Bucky shrugged. "It's hard to put it all together. It's flashes mostly. Falling. Cold. Pain--a lot of pain." His sigh sounded like part sadness, part frustration. "Flashes are all I have, asleep or awake," he said slowly, like the words were hard to find. "I've been to the Smithsonian, and I've searched the internet, but I'm still not sure how much of what I remember is really mine, and what I learned from somewhere else."

"It must be hard."

The words were inadequate, but Bucky didn't seem to mind. "There are a few things I am sure are my memories," he said. "Falling out of the train. The tests. The surgery for my arm, and bits and pieces after when they were training me to do all my 'good work' for the 'greater good.'" His lips had a wry twist before he said, "Turned out it was really just for Hydra's greater good. Guess that was what the pain was for--to distract me from noticing that. They drilled home the lesson that there is no order without pain."

"That's not true," Steve said. "There can be order without so much pain."

"You gonna tell me either of our lives back that claim up?"

He couldn't. Because they were two sides of the same coin--both weaponized, fed lies, and used by Hydra for their own purposes, both without their knowledge or consent to the end game. 

"Hydra's days of hiding are over," Steve said. "I'm starting over without any ties to them. You can, too."

Bucky's laugh was harsh and humorless. "Hard to do anything but start over when you can't really remember anything. What if I forget what little I have managed to get back? What if they've done their job too well?"

"You won't. They didn't." Steve leaned in a little closer, wanting Bucky to get this point. "You just have to believe."

"I'm trying," Bucky said, before ending the conversation by pulling Steve down into a kiss.

***

Danny woke to find himself alone in the bed, the first rays of sun just starting to lighten the sky. He listened carefully and realized he could hear Steve talking, just outside the bedroom. 

"--still there?" Steve said. There was a pause before he said, "And you checked again, right?" After a second, Steve said, "Okay. Thanks. Let me know if anything unusual happens."

A moment later, Danny heard Steve's bare feet padding along the wood floor into the bedroom. The bed dipped beside him, and Steve crawled back under the covers carefully, wrapping himself around Danny and giving him a kiss on the neck. "Morning," Steve said.

"Morning," Danny replied, not even pretending he hadn't been listening. "Wo Fat still where you left him?"

"Still firmly locked away for now." Steve's eyes were just barely visible in the predawn light as he met Danny's gaze. "I had to check," Steve said. "Given everything...I had to check."

"I know," Danny replied. "I get it. Just...you can't let all that--Wo Fat, your mother, what happened with your father, all of that--you can't let it run your life. You have to find some kind of balance."

Steve's arm tightened a little around Danny. "I have found a balance," he said. "That's why I'm here. With you." Steve shifted, one leg sliding across both of Danny's. "You pull me back before I go too far, and that lets me push myself to my limit, because I know you won't let me go past it."

"You have limits?" Danny asked, eyebrows raised. "News to me."

Steve huffed out a faint laugh. "I'm serious," he said, and Danny could hear the sincerity in his voice. "I know I seem a little crazy sometimes--"

"Sometimes?"

Steve rolled his eyes as he continued, "but I know my limits. And I know when I try to push past them, you'll stop me."

"When have I ever stopped you from anything?"

"Probably more times than you know." Steve ducked his head, humor lacing his voice. "Did I forget to show you my What Would Danny Do bracelet?"

"Now I know you're full of shit."

Steve laughed. "No," he said, settling in a little. "I'm just happy." 

He pressed his forehead to Danny's temple, and Danny laid his arm overtop of Steve's and enjoyed the quiet.

***

The metal of Bucky's arm no longer felt strange against Steve's skin as he woke. He could tell the sun was coming up by the amount of light filtering through the sides of the tent, but he didn't want to get up. He wanted to stay in bed, where they didn't have to face the real world. Forget Hydra, forget all the mess going on outside the tent, and just hibernate there for a while.

They'd damn well earned it, he knew that much.

He also knew it wasn't an option. Sam would be looking for him soon. And he'd promised McGarrett and Williams that he'd find a cell Wo Fat couldn't break out of. Duty called.

Story of his life.

Bucky didn't wake up lazily, the way Steve remembered from when they were kids. One second he was asleep, the next second he was wide awake, muscles tensed as if he was in the middle of a battle. He blinked until his eyes fell on Steve's face. After a moment's confused frown, a smile settled into place. "Morning."

"Morning," Steve replied. "You okay?"

Bucky seemed to give the question some actual thought before nodding. "Better than I have been in a while at any rate. You?"

"I'm good." Steve stretched, trying to ignore the way his body reacted to the rub of Bucky's against his. "I should probably get going soon, though. Before someone sounds the alarm that I'm gone."

"Right. Your friend will be looking for you."

The way Bucky said 'friend' made Steve frown. "Sam has been helping me find you," Steve said. "I wouldn't have made it here and tracked you down without his help."

"That's nice of him."

His voice said it was anything but, and Steve sat up, looking down at Bucky. "He's a good friend," Steve said. "And part of the reason I'm not dead."

Something flashed over Bucky's face. "Which is more than you can say for me."

Steve shook his head, putting his hand on Bucky's metal forearm to make his point. "You're my best friend," he said. "And the reason I'm not lying on the bottom of the Potomac River."

"I'm also the reason you were in the Potomac in the first place."

"No, that was Hydra's doing. You overcame it all and saved me."

One corner of Bucky's mouth quirked up. "That's a change from all the times you saved me."

Steve studied him. "You remember those?"

Bucky gave him a half shrug. "I'm not sure how much is memory and how much I learned, but some of it...yeah. I think so."

A rooster crowed in the distance, reminding Steve that his stolen night was at an end. "I need to get back," he said, sliding out of the cot reluctantly. He could feel Bucky's eyes on him the entire time he dressed, and turned back to see Bucky still watching him, a small smile on his face. 

Steve sat down on the edge of the cot, holding Bucky's gaze. "Look, Buck...I think you should come back with me."

Bucky's smile faded, his lips thinning out. "I can't," he said after a moment.

"Sure you can. I know you weren't the assassin. It's safe."

His laugh was harsh and short. "Sure, it's safe. Except for half of Hydra is probably looking for me. And I don't know what they can do to me if they find me, because I only remember bits and pieces of whatever they did to program me."

"You know now, though. They can't get you again."

"They were so good I almost killed you," Bucky said, sounding tortured. "I can't let them do that to me again." He took a deep breath. "Besides, I need to find out who I am."

"I know who you are," Steve said. He knew Bucky to his core. "I can help you."

Bucky shook his head. "If I went back now, if I let you help me...I'd be your memory of me. I need to find myself. On my own."

After a moment, Steve nodded. He got that. He'd needed time to do that, and he hadn't had his mind messed with anything like Bucky had. 

He just didn't want Bucky to disappear again. 

"Promise me," Steve said, "that you'll keep in touch. Let me know you're okay." When Bucky didn't immediately respond, Steve said, "Promise?"

Bucky nodded. "Yeah. I promise. 

"And when you figure out who you are," Steve said carefully, "you know where to find me."

"What if you don't like who I am?"

"No chance. I know you."

Bucky's mouth curled into a soft smile again. "Maybe someday soon I'll know me, too."

"I hope so." 

Steve couldn't resist leaning down for one last kiss before sitting up to stare down at Bucky, feeling like he had to memorize every line of his face again. "Remember, you promised."

"I know." Bucky nodded towards the entrance to the tent. "Go. Before your friend sends out the Army or something to look for you."

Steve got up, picked up his shield, and started walking. He made it all the way to the tent entrance before he turned back around. "Good luck," he said, because everything else that was stuck in his head seemed too heavy and too soon. 

"Thanks."

Steve walked out without another look back.

***

By the time Cap got back to the hotel, courtesy of a driver who was all too happy to stop and pick up a hitchhiking Captain America, the sun was actually peeking up from above the mountains. Steve got onto the elevator before remembering that he'd left via the balcony, and didn't have his key. 

Being Captain America didn't just make it easier to hitchhike--the girl at the front desk was only too happy to give him his key along with her phone number. He thanked her without comment on the number and went up to his room.

He was thinking only of getting a shower before Sam came looking for him, so he didn't notice someone sitting on his bed until the door was fully closed. He barely had time to raise his shield before he realized who it was.

"Natasha," he said, crossing the room to stand in front of her. "Were you trying to give me a heart attack?"

"You're out of practice if that was enough to scare you," she said.

He sighed. "I thought you went in search of a new cover. What are you doing here?"

She pushed up off the bed, arching an eyebrow at him. "I was wondering the same thing about you," she said. "Did you find what you were looking for?"

"That depends on what you think I'm looking for."

"An assassin?"

"I found one," he said, not caring if she figured out who. He trusted her by now. "Just not the one who killed Whistler."

"Really?" She held up her hand, then dropped a couple of bullets onto the bed. He didn't need a microscope to guess that they were a perfect match to the Winter Soldier M.O., but she tossed a file with Whistler's name on it on top of them, just in case he was feeling particularly dense. 

"You?" he said, though the only real surprise he held was that he hadn't figured that out earlier.

She shrugged. "Somebody's gotta take down Hydra."

His eyes narrowed as he studied her. "Bullets aren't really your style."

"No. They aren't." Her raised eyebrow made him frown, until she rolled her eyes. "They are, however, someone's style I thought would get your attention."

The pieces fell into place. "You knew Bucky was out here and used the assassination to get me out here to find him?"

She shrugged. "Why not kill two birds with one bullet?"

"Why not just give me a call?"

"Where's the fun in that?" She got up, walking by him almost close enough to touch on her way to the door. "He coming home with you?"

"No. Said he had to find himself."

She turned, her hand on the door. "Seems to me you'd be the first place to look for that."

"Yeah, seems to you," Steve said. "To him...well."

"I wouldn't give up just yet." She opened the door. "All roads lead to Rome."

He blinked. "What?"

"Be careful, Steve," she said with a smile as she walked out, the door closing quietly behind her. 

He was still staring at the door when there was a soft knock. He crossed the room and opened the door to find Sam on the other side. "Did I imagine that red head looked a lot like Romanov?" Sam said.

"No, it wasn't your imagination."

Sam came in and Cap shut the door behind him. "What did she want?"

"To confess to Whistler's assassination." 

Both Sam's eyebrows shot up. "It was her?"

Cap nodded. "Apparently she's not too busy finding a new cover to take out some of Hydra along the way."

"So we were on a wild goose chase?"

"Not entirely." Steve sighed, already editing the story in his head as he spoke. "That Rumlow I'd been seeing? It wasn't Rumlow."

"Who was it?"

"Bucky."

Sam's eyebrows shot even higher the second time. "You found him?"

Cap nodded again. "He showed up last night."

Sam looked around. "Where is he?"

"Off finding himself." 

He didn't need Sam's look of sympathy to tell him he'd done a terrible job of hiding how he felt about that. "Did he say how long it would take?"

"No. But he promised to stay in touch."

"And you believed him?"

"Yeah," Cap said softly. "Yeah, I believed him."

He could tell Sam was a lot more skeptical, but then Sam didn't know Bucky. Amnesia or not, Bucky wouldn't lie to Steve. And he wouldn't let him down. 

"If you say so," Sam said after a moment. "You know the guy."

"Yeah. I know him." 

"Well, while you're waiting to hear from him again, Williams called. He wanted to know if we'd made any progress on finding a cell that might actually hold Wo Fat. And if we could install a tamper-proof camera in it with internet feed...though I'm still not sure if that last part was a joke."

"It does seem to be hard to tell with him sometimes, doesn't it?"

The shared laugh seemed to ease the tension Cap only then realized had been hanging around them. "I told him we'd stop by their offices after breakfast."

"Then I'd better get on the phone to Hill." 

***

It wasn't until they were ready to leave for work, after a much longer than three minutes shower, that Danny realized they might have a problem. 

"Maybe we should take separate cars."

Danny frowned at him. "Why?"

Steve's shrug was less telling than the way he couldn't quite look Danny in the eye. "I have an errand to run."

"You suck at lying." Danny moved closer, touching Steve on the shoulder. "What's wrong?"

After a moment of stalling, Steve finally met his eyes. "I feel like if anyone finds out we're together, something will go wrong. I just need a couple of days to get used to it."

Given Steve's issues about losing Danny, it wasn't exactly a surprise. "You do realize," Danny said, "if we show up in different cars that's actually going to look more suspicious than if we don't?"

"Not if I say I had an errand."

Privately, Danny thought Steve was both underestimating Chin and Kono and overestimating his ability to lie, but he knew how worried Steve was, so he let it go. "So what errand are you going to run?"

"I'm not. I'm just going to say I had to run one."

Yeah, he might as well just wear a sign when he walked into HQ. "You're sure that's how you want to play this?"

"Yeah." Steve gave him a small smile. "We'll tell them in a couple of days, I promise. I want them to know. I just need a day or two. You get it, right?"

"I get it." Just like he got that sometimes he had to let Steve make his own mistakes. Danny stretched up for a kiss. "Come on, let's go."

***

Steve lagged a little behind Danny as they walked into the bullpen. Chin and Kono were already there, looking at something on the computer table, but they looked up as Steve and Danny reached the table. 

"Hey, we were searching--" Kono stopped, looking at Danny, her eyes narrowing before she looked at Steve. Smirking, she turned to Chin and held out a hand.

Chin looked at both of them, sighed, pulled out his wallet and handed her a fifty dollar bill. "I'll give you the rest after I go to the bank."

Danny couldn't help his own little smirk as he looked at Steve. "I tried to tell you."

"What?" Steve's furrowed brow was even cuter when Danny could feel superior about it. "What just happened?"

The fact that Kono and Chin laughed along with him made Danny feel a little less guilty about laughing at that. "I tried to tell you that it wouldn't work."

Steve's brow cleared, then furrowed again. "How--I mean, what--seriously? What gave it away?"

"If you have to ask, brah...." Kono said.

"You just cost me a hundred bucks," Chin added. "I'm not telling you."

Steve looked at Danny. "You did hire them for a reason," was all Danny would say. 

Chin stepped forward, a genuine smile on his face. "Congratulations," he said, touching Steve on the arm, then Danny. "It's about time."

Kono laughed. "Long overdue," she said, pulling each one of them into a hug in turn.

Steve's face was bright red by the time they were done. "Thank you," he said, his eyes darting around, looking at anything that wasn't a human face. "So, um, you were saying you'd searched for something?"

"Yeah, we got Danny's email with the basics about what happened while we were gone this weekend, and we did some research on prison facilities, and--"

"I think I can do better than any facility you'll find on a list," Cap said from the doorway. 

Danny turned to see him standing there with Sam and one of the HPD guards. "Your friend Stark come through?"

Cap nodded as Steve waved off the guard and Cap and Sam joined them by the table. "He had a design for a holding cell he thought might be useful if Loki ever came back, and he's dying to try it out."

"If a god couldn't get out of it, Wo Fat might stay," Danny said.

"Loki's not a god," Cap said, "but for the purposes of this conversation, close enough. And some of the modifications Stark has made to a typical cell are pretty impressive. It should hold him."

"A supermax prison should've held him," Steve said. At Danny's look, Steve sighed. "Sorry," he said to Cap, holding out a hand. "Thank you. We appreciate it."

Cap shook his hand. "No problem. You let us horn in on your case, so I'm happy to return the favor."

"About the case..." Sam said.

Danny watched as some silent argument took place between Sam and Cap, before Cap nodded. "You can close the books on Whistler's murder."

Danny didn't need to look at Steve to know the expression that would be on his face. "Really? You brought someone in without us noticing?"

"It was SHIELD taking down Hydra," Cap said. "That's all you need to know."

"All I need to know?" Steve asked, and Danny took a step closer to him in case he needed to intervene, because Captain America and his slightly more human clone could do a lot of damage to their office if they were let loose on each other. "Okay, sure, I'll just tell the Governor that all he needs to know is that it was an assassination by a renounced government organization. I'm sure he'll just accept that."

"Tell him that you know the citizens of Hawaii are safe, as long as they're not criminals." Cap's eyebrow went up. "I've read about some of your exploits, I'm sure he's used to taking that for an answer."

Danny stepped between the two of them, hand on Steve's arm. "Okay," he said, squeezing Steve's arm tightly when he felt Steve trying to push forward anyway. "You're sure you know who the guy is?" Danny asked.

Cap nodded. "I know who killed Whistler, and they aren't a threat."

"What about your whole Winter Soldier thing?" Danny asked. "We're not in any danger?"

"The Winter Soldier is just a myth," Cap said, and Danny didn't miss the look on Sam's face at that. Cap might buy that, but Sam was still considering the evidence. "No one is in danger from him."

Two very different statements that didn't quite add up, but Danny believed that Cap was convinced no one was in danger. And Sam didn't argue that fact, even if he seemed a little less uncertain. "So if your ghost chase is over," Danny said, "I take it you're leaving town?"

Cap nodded. "Stark is flying a special jet here now that should land in a couple of hours. It's got a version of the holding cell on it we'll use to take Wo Fat to the facility."

"I'm coming with you," Steve said, to the surprise of no one in the room, except, apparently, Cap. 

"We can handle it."

Steve shook his head. "You don't know him, you don't know what to look for. I do."

Danny recognized the strain in Steve's voice--he was reaching the end of his ability to play like a civilized person. "We're both coming with you," Danny said. "We want to see him in his cell with our own eyes." When Cap still hesitated, Danny added, "You want us to cover up a murder for you. This is the price."

Not following what was clearly a dead end that no one really wanted prosecuted in the first place was nowhere near the same as covering up a murder, but the tactic worked. Cap nodded. "We have clearance to land at Hickam at eleven hundred for an hour before we take off again," he said. "Be there, or the plane leaves without you."

"Doesn't make a lot of sense for it to take off without your prisoner," Danny said.

Cap closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath. "Sorry," he said, "it was a long night. We'll be happy to stay here and help escort him to the plane. The more protection the better."

Danny could feel some of Steve's tension leaving him. "Thank you," Steve said. "We appreciate the help."

"We all want the same thing, right?" Cap said.

Danny looked at Sam, and recognized the look on his face, or rather the feeling behind it, as he looked at Cap. 

Yeah, they all wanted the same thing. It was just a crapshoot as to who was lucky enough to get it.

***

Danny was finishing up the paperwork officially transferring Wo Fat into a little known facility that he'd just made up so none of his associates (or Steve's mother, Danny thought, with no small amount of annoyance at the woman) could track him down easily and help him escape again, when Sam knocked on the door to his office.

"Come in," Danny said, closing the file and setting it aside. 

"Thanks." Sam took a seat in front of Danny's desk. "Cap and McGarrett were going to the armory you have downstairs, and I wasn't sure I wanted to be anywhere near the two of them and guns."

"I don't know, they might kill each other if someone's not there to intervene."

He didn't actually believe that, and he could tell that Sam took it as a joke. "Cap's pretty hard to kill."

"So is McGarrett," Danny said. "Thank God."

Sam studied him for a long moment. "I get the feeling," he said slowly, "that McGarrett figured out that girlfriend wasn't a girlfriend anymore."

"He might've figured that out, yeah," Danny said, failing to completely hold back a smile.

"That's good. Congratulations." 

Danny nodded a thanks, but he could tell from Sam's smile that something was off. "I take it Cap hasn't let go of his past?"

"Cap...." Sam sighed, looking like he was searching for the right words. "He found his past," he said finally. 

"But not his future?"

"I don't know. Maybe." Sam shrugged. "Either way, I don't think that's a past I can compete with."

Danny leaned forward, elbows on the desk. "You never know," he said. "I would have sworn a few days ago that Steve was going to be waiting for Catherine for years, and yet...."

"No, something's changed," Sam said. "He has hope. I mean, he was hopeful before. But now he has real hope. I don't think that's going to go away."

"I'm sorry." Danny knew all too well how that felt, and he didn't wish it on anyone, especially a nice guy like Sam. "So are you gonna stick around with him? Or move on?"

Sam huffed out a short laugh. "If your situation had turned out differently, could you have left?"

Of course not, but he didn't think he really had to answer. Sam knew that already. "I hope you're wrong," Danny said. "I hope it works out."

"The really sad things is," Sam said, as if he was figuring it out as the words came out, "I kind of hope I'm right. He needs this. And I need him to be happy."

Spoken like a man in love, Danny realized, thinking about all the ways he'd tried to help make sure Steve kept Catherine, because he thought Catherine made him happy. "I get it," Danny said. "Doesn't mean it doesn't suck."

"You are absolutely right about that."

***

Danny watched Steve as the door closed on Wo Fat, and Stark entered a code into a pad beside it. "That should hold him," Stark said. "It's build to hold off methods he hasn't even heard of, so unless he has some Asgardian friends--no, wait, even if he did, it wouldn't help." Stark frowned, studying Steve a little closer before he turned to Danny. "Does he speak?"

"I speak," Steve said, before Danny could answer. His voice was rusty, though, sounding as though he didn't speak much. And he hadn't for the last few hours. He'd just sat on the plane, hand on his holstered Sig, staring at Wo Fat, almost like he was willing Wo Fat to try something so Steve could shoot him. "Thank you."

Stark shrugged. "Glad to have a guinea pig for my new creation. If it can hold your master escape artist in there, then maybe it might work on anything that comes through a wormhole or something." Stark looked back at the door. "What'd he do, anyway?"

"A lot of things," Steve said. "Some of them we even know about."

"Great." Stark stepped away from the door. "I'll be sure not to visit him for a chat."

"We'd prefer he didn't have any visitors," Danny said, brushing his arm against Steve's to try to get some of the tension out of him. 

Stark shrugged. "This isn't Club Med," he said, gesturing around him to the facility that was so far underground Danny half expected to see the ball of fire at the center of the earth. "I'm assuming you didn't send out change of address cards for him."

"No one knows he's here but us," Steve said, nodding at the five of them standing around the room. 

Danny thought it was progress that Steve apparently trusted that Cap and Sam weren't going to be spilling the location to anyone. "How many people in here know who he is?" Danny asked Stark.

"Just me." Stark nodded at what looked like a blue Iron Man suit walking around by itself nearby, checking on some panels on the wall. "This level is run by Blinky over there, who's connected with my private computer. And nobody could see your guy brought in through the back elevator. This place was designed so no one would know a world famous prisoner was here. They're not going to find this guy."

Danny was watching Steve again, could see the 'They always do,' running through his mind, and he brushed their arms together again, letting the touch linger a little longer this time. "Thank you," Steve said again.

"Don't mention it." Stark led them back to the elevator. "Take the jet back to Hawaii," he said to Steve and Danny. "Cap, new guy, care to hitch a ride with me? I've got a couple of suits that will make those archaic mechanical wings the new guy thinks are so awesome look like dodo birds."

Sam laughed, and Danny hoped that Stark could distract the guy from everything else going on. He knew what it felt like to be in his shoes. He just hoped Sam could move on. 

The elevator shot up its fifty thousand stories so quickly Danny felt vaguely ill. Since it looked like he was the only one, judging by the stoic faces around him, he kept that to himself. 

Steve thanked Stark again when they reached the plane. "Sure you don't need the plane?" Steve asked.

"They're like buses," Stark said. "There'll be another one in fifteen minutes."

"I'll need to come back and talk to Wo Fat," Steve said. "He still has information I need."

Stark nodded. "I'll give you a call in a few weeks and arrange it. He should be stir crazy enough to talk by then."

"Thanks." Steve said a thank you and a goodbye to Cap and Sam before climbing onto the plane. 

Danny said goodbye to Cap, who turned to talk to Stark after as Danny said goodbye to Sam. "Good luck," Danny said. "If you ever need to talk, you've got my number."

"Thanks," Sam said, shaking Danny's hand. "I'll be okay, but it's always good to have someone to talk to when it gets tough."

Danny turned and got on the plane.

***

Steve was silent through takeoff, staring out into space until Danny couldn't take it any longer. "Okay, I know that this plane has a few more distractions than that cargo flight to Cambodia," Danny said, "but I'm pretty sure they'd be more fun with a little conversation. Maybe at least a smile?"

Steve's face softened as he looked at Danny, a hint of a smile around his mouth. "Sorry. Just thinking."

"I know. Stop it."

One eyebrow arched up. "Got something better for me to think about?"

"That depends. You think you can stop worrying and start living, so to speak, now that Wo Fat is contained?"

Steve's huff was enough for Danny to confirm that he still wasn't sure that facility would hold Wo Fat. But he'd have to get past that, and Danny couldn't fix that for him. "I think I can," Steve said at last, slowly, as if just figuring it out. "Maybe with a little help?"

Which was a lot for Steve to admit. "I'm sorry, is there a problem with the pressurization in the cabin?" Danny asked. "I could have sworn you just asked for help."

"Well, if you don't want to help.."

Danny was out of his seat and over to Steve's side before that sentence ended. "Unbuckle that seatbelt and come with me," Danny said.

"Where?" Steve asked, but he unbuckled the belt and stood up. 

"I noticed on the way out here that the bathroom is bigger than my bathroom at home," Danny said. "I think the Mile High club would be an excellent way to start living."

"See, I knew you could help."

***

Steve opened the small mailbox in the wall in the lobby to his apartment building, freezing when he saw the postcard. Where Bucky had found Captain America postcards, Steve had no idea, but considering the Bucky he remembered would've found that hysterical, Steve just thought it was a good sign. Anything that showed Bucky's personality was still there was a very good sign.

"Is that mail gonna bite?" Sam asked from behind him.

Steve pulled the mail out of the box, flipping the card over to find no message on the back. Just like the one before. He sighed and held it up so Sam could see. 

"Nothing on it?"

Steve shook his head. "He said he'd let me know he was still alive. He didn't say he'd be chatty about it."

"How do you even know they're from him?" Sam asked as he followed Steve up to his apartment. 

Steve waited until he was inside his bug-proofed apartment, the door closed, away from prying eyes and ears to say, "Because I know."

Sam studied him for a long time. "What happened that night? It's been two months and you haven't said a thing other than you talked and he went off to find himself."

Steve had had a lot of practice over those two months not blushing when he was asked about it, but he thought Sam might have guessed. "Not much else to tell."

"Look, man, I get it if you can't talk to me about him. I didn't know him and I don't pretend to know what he went through. But maybe you should talk to your friend, Peggy, because she knew him."

Steve was shaking his head before the sentence was even done. "Peggy was a soldier, but she was more of a higher up. She knew Bucky, but not the way I did."

"Then track down Romanov," Sam said. "She at least has some idea what he was put through."

"Natasha's a spy. A friend. But a spy. They live on never completely trusting anyone. She wouldn't get it."

"You need to talk to someone about it."

Steve gave Sam a smile. "You're the only one who knows what it's like to be in the trenches with someone," Steve said quietly. "You know what it's like to lose someone out there. You're the only person I trust who understands. If there was anything to talk about, I'd talk to you. But there's nothing to talk about."

He could tell Sam wasn't quite buying it, but it was true. Some parts of what happened between Steve and Bucky that night were nobody else's business. And the rest of it he'd already talked to Sam about. There was nothing else to say.

After a moment, Sam nodded. "If anything does come up, I'm here."

"I know. Thank you."

***

Steve woke with a start, something more than the faint sound of late night DC traffic alerting his senses. He remained still, ignoring the urge to reach for his shield and feigning sleep as he listened for whatever had woken him up. It only took a few seconds to identify the sound of breathing, quiet though he was.

He wasn't alone in the room.

He rolled over, hand casually off the side of the bed, ready to grab the shield that lay there. A glint of moonlight off metal flashed in his eyes for a moment. 

Bucky.

Steve sat up, blinking, but Bucky didn't disappear, the way he always did in dreams. "You're here," Steve said finally.

"You said when I figured out who I was, I knew where to find you."

"Does that mean you're here to stay?"

Bucky's smile was brighter than the metal in the moonlight. "To the end of the line."

\---  
END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Want to learn more about me and my writing? Visit my page at <http://www.jamiemeadowswrites.com/>

**Author's Note:**

> Want to learn more about me and my writing? Visit my page at <http://www.jamiemeadowswrites.com/>


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